Youth Coaches: You Should Quit If You Don't Do These Two Things

As a youth coach, these two things should stand above all else...

1 - Igniting a passion for sports and fitness that extends through adulthood

2 - Teach life lessons and have a lifelong positive impact beyond the sport you are coaching

Youth sports should provide physical activities that kids can learn, so they stay fit, happy, and healthy the rest of their lives.

As long as you prioritze those two things, there is nothing wrong with trying to maximize the development of your players. That's why the following information is very important...

The Surprising Commonality Among Youth Coaches and Teachers of Elite Talent

In Daniel Coyle's The Talent Code, he studied hotbeds of talent. These areas statistically produced elite talent at an incredible pace unlike anywhere else in the world. Here is a brief description of the book:

Whether you're coaching soccer or teaching a child to play the piano, writing a novel or trying to improve your golf swing, this revolutionary book shows you how to grow talent by tapping into a newly discovered brain mechanism.

Drawing on cutting-edge neurology and firsthand research gathered on journeys to nine of the world's talent hotbeds-from the baseball fields of the Caribbean to a classical-music academy in upstate New York-Coyle identifies the three key elements that will allow you to develop your gifts and optimize your performance in sports, art, music, math, or just about anything.

In one section of the book, he studies master teachers and master coaches.

Among these talent hotbeds, the one surprising commonality was a characteristic of their youth coaches and teachers...

62% of these coaches were described as having average expertise. And only 24% were better than average!

But there was something else that was VERY IMPORTANT...

Coyle found that all of these coaches and teachers made it fun and ignited a passion for that activity!

Key Characteristics of Great Youth Coaches

As Coyle describes in his book, these coaches and teachers were...

  • Great with kids.
  • Kindly, very nice.
  • Liked kids instinctively and had a good rapport.
  • Enormously patient and not very pushy.

Some of the students made these comments about their coaches and teachers...

"She carried a big basket of Hershey bars and gold stars for music and I was crazy about this lady."

"It was an event for me to go to my lessons."

As Coyle points out, these were not average teachers by any means! They were experts at igniting a passion and love for the activity.

Additionally, Coyle also found this...

Many of these students stayed with these youth and coach teachers for 5 to 6 years. The students often stayed with these teachers until they were about 12, 13, or 14 years old.

If you don't focus on igniting a passion, you could have a great athlete who doesn't want to play or practice beyond their high school or college years.

This is a major reason that 70% of youth athletes quit organized sport before the age of 13.

Who cares if you develop the best 8, 10, 13, or 16 year old if we burned them out?

We often skip the step where it's fun for the athlete and the passion is ignited.

And that's insane! I've worked with so many kids under the age of 14 or 15 who weren't very good athletes. Then these same athletes went on to become very good high school players and even college athletes. You will even find many stories where similar athletes become professionals at their craft.

You want to set them up, so when they reach their teenage years, they want to practice and work at these activities they love. If you push too hard and make it feel like a job, you'll destroy their joy for the sport or activity.

You should "slow-cook" the athletes rather than "microwave" them.

High-Level Coaches and Athletes Don't Always Equate to Good Youth Coaches

I've known very good college coaches and high-level players who were awful youth coaches. It's not because they were bad people. It's because they didn't have an understanding of youth development.

I was once working with a Dad who was a former college player. He was very technical and competitive. The problem was... he was working with players 10 years old and younger.

While he had a great intent and was a good guy, his wife who was a 2nd grade teacher with minimal basketball background was the much better youth coach!

She made it fun! She had a great demeanor. It was about creating a passion, getting everybody involved, and teaching them the value in working as a team, rewarding great effort and hustle, and having a great attitude.

Also, it's okay if coaching youth sports is not your thing. This isn't for everybody. You can always become an analyst or coach older players.

But as skill acquisition expert Brian McCormick wrote about coaching at the youth level, "You coach to develop the players. Players play to win."

*** Note: I've also known some college coaches that were great youth coaches. It's just to show that the level of expertise doesn't equate to being the right fit or a good coach at the youth level.

The Importance of Positive Impact Coaching and Teaching Life Lessons

As noted above, it's also very important to teach life lessons and make a positive impact that extends years beyond the time that you coached your athletes.

You should teach things like...

  • Hard work / effort
  • Attitude
  • Teamwork
  • Effective communication
  • Problem solving
  • Conflict resolution
  • Honesty
  • Integrity
  • Perseverance
  • Empathy
  • Sportsmanship
  • Respect to others and yourself
  • Helping and giving to others

You could certainly add many other things to this list.

Since having a positive impact beyond the court is so important to us, we created this section on our website for you where you can reference more ideas and thoughts:

Positive Impact Coaching

Here are some popular articles:

The Most Important Aspect of Coaching & Leadership - Being a Good Role Model

2 Simple Ways to Make a Positive Impact on Your Players' Lives

What Are Your 7 Core Coaching Values?

More Important Than The X's and O's - Helping Develop Kids Into Adults With Integrity

Youth Coaching Videos

The Youth Coaching System with Jim Huber

Coaching Middle School Basketball the Right Way with Bob Bigelow



What do you think? Let us know by leaving your comments, suggestions, and questions...




Comments

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Paul Secker says:
10/23/2020 at 9:15:05 AM

I would like to humbly suggest that you get rid of the word talent in the first section of your email. Using the idea of talent suggests that you either have it or you don't, and that some people are just lucky and talented and some are not. Throughout the rest of the article you do not use it and all the things that you describe as being the keys to success, making the activity fun, teaching the kids to have great attitudes and to work hard have nothing to do with talent. In my experience the kids who get praise for having talent don't necessarily learn to work, and the kids who are not told that they are talented can quit prematurely because they don't think they have it in them. I prefer to use the word experience because quite often it is about somebody's experience rather than their talent that explains certain aspects of their behavior on the court or in other situations.

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Joseph Haefner says:
10/23/2020 at 10:02:55 AM

Paul, you mention some great points. I appreciate the feedback!

I've read Mindset by Carol Dweck, so I definitely agree with your statements about the negative aspects of praising talent. I hope didn't portray that in my writing.

As I believe you're hinting and I totally agree with, you want to be process-focused, not outcome-focused.

"Great hustle." "Way to give 100% effort."

Compliment the right decision even if the outcome wasn't what you wanted. Correct the poor decision even if the outcome was positive.

I need to think about this a little more.

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Scott Rosberg says:
11/10/2020 at 11:48:54 AM

Paul & Joe,
You both are right. However, Paul, the book that Joe is referring to is called, "The Talent Code." Therefore, the discussion is on the concept of talent and how in these "hotbeds" around the world, talent gets developed. The idea is that by doing all the things that you both describe, people can then have a better opportunity to become "talented."

Yes, we can get wrapped up in the idea that "you either have it or you don't." That is the Fixed Mindset that Carol Dweck speaks of. But I never saw what Joe was saying here as creating that. He was talking about how talent gets developed over time by coaches focusing on doing the right things. One of the right things is encouraging kids to have a love of the game by showing your love of the game and love of them and working with them, so they enjoy it more.

When I was coaching my son's teams as youth basketball players, I had two main goals - that they all wanted to play again the next year and that I taught them a little bit about the game and a lot about life. The best way I could achieve those was to make sure they had a lot of fun and to try to ignite a passion for the game in them.

Interestingly, the more I thought about that with him and his teammates, the more I realized that I also had those as my major goals for my frosh, JV, and varsity teams for all the years that I coached at those levels, too. Isn't that what we should be trying to provide for kids? The opportunity to have such a positive athletic experience that they want to come back for more in the future and the opportunity to learn valuable lessons that will help them anywhere they go in life?

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