Relationship Between Coach and Players

I have a question. How to establish a good relationship between the coach and the players since some of the players in our team are always arguing to our coach and as a result the coach-player relationship is being destroyed.

Thank you

First of all the coach has to let them know WHO is in CHARGE.

Then he has to let them know that he cares about them, not just as a player, but as a person. Most kids will run through a wall IF they know the coach cares.... IF they think he doesn't - forget it, you are going to have a long year.

I don't know the age group here, but this isn't a democracy, I used to tell my players that if they wanted it their way, go to Burger King. As long as you are playing for this team we will do it our way.

That does not mean that you cant have a conversation with them.... he might have to do a better job of explaining what he wants done and why. We told our players that in games we wont have time to explain everything, just believe in us and do what we say....... if you want explanations, we will give you that in practice.

He needs to have a well thought out practice plan, one where he goes from one drill or segment to another - one that he knows exactly what he is trying to teach - keep them moving in practice and they will know that he understands and can teach the game.

He might have to sit donw and have a conversation with them and explain his philosophy..... questions and answers at that time..... then move on and take control of the team. Don't let the tail wag the dog. JMO

He might choose a couple of captains, players that can help take control of the team and show some good leadership. Sometimes kids will listen to their peers more than adults.

Does this answer your question?

Hi Coach Sar,

Thank you so much for the information and I hope this will help improve our team. By the way we are college student athletes from Philippines. And as the team captain of our basketball men's team I'm just concern because this will be my last playing year and the team now is almost composed of rookies. Also I want to be a coach after playing that's why early as now I'm collecting informations and ideas on how to become a great coach.

Thank you,
Al

Al,

This is a great opportunity for you.... be the coach on the floor, you are the SENIOR guy, they should be looking to you for LEADERSHIP. IF you don't know exactly what the coach wants, sit down with him and pick his brains. Find out exactly what he wants - its his team... and NOW YOURS.

Then lead by example, do the things that need to be done when they need to be done and do it that way all the time. ( I think thats how Bobby Knight put it )

If someone steps out of line or isn't doing something the way it should be done, explain to him - "thats not the way we want it done here" Then show him how it should be done. You also might explain to the players that arguing with the coach wont help him or the team.... be a TEAM player.

I hope you can realize your dream of becoming a coach.... its one of the most satisfying things I have ever done with my life - teaching the greatest game and helping young people. Stay in touch with us - let us know how things are going and we will be happy to help you realize your dream. Good luck.

Coach Sar,

Thank you so much for your inspiring message coach. Hope that someday I can be a great coach just like you and I want know more about coaching and I know you can be one of my mentor.

God Bless and more power...

Al

Be ambitious, always continue to learn, and let your passion come out everytime you teach and you will do great.

Here is link to a very important aspect you will want to start building now and continue to work on. I wish I had known this 5 years ago.

http://spartanpt.com/uncategorized/project-learn-with-me-coaching-philosophy.html

Thanks for the kind words Al,

I will be more than happy to help you out in your quest to be a coach.... ( as will the rest of the guys here ) just remember to be a great teacher and a student of the game.

God Bless you and good luck this season, I hope things work out for you. Let us know how things are going from time to time.

Great message from Coach Springer by the way. You are going to learn different things from every coach you come in contact with..... listen, write things down.... add and delete things as you develop your own philosophy.

Coach Wooden often sums things up well. A coaches job is in many respects the most important job you will ever have. Even if you are a lawyer, or doctor, or architect, no other position demands the responsibility of shaping, mentoring and modelling for potentially dozens of youngsters in their most formative years. It is truly an honor and a privilidge to be a coach and a huge responsibility comes with this position. Way too many coaches in all sports have no clue the impact they bring to their players.

"No written word, no spoken plea can teach our youth what they should be. Nor all the books on all the shelves, it's what the teachers are themselves." John Wooden

Al: I know phillipine basketball as I coach Professional in Hong Kong and also referee in the city league that has several philipino teams in it. I know your passion for the game and I have experienced first hand how sometimes phillipino emotions can transcend sportsmanship. I have been to your beautiful country several times and taken in games of the P.B.A. and I have done basketball clinics with Alvin Petromunio a fine and decent human being as well as an excellent legendary player. This is my advice, and it may sound dictatoria but, when it comes to any basketbal team it is not a democracy. The coach IS in charge!! now, this is not to suggest that it is a complete autocracy, good coaches are receptive and listen to suggestions. Good coaches care about thier players and their well being, good coaches always have an open door policy. If this is the kind of coach you have, then approach him respectfully with your problems. However, from what I am reading, most of your problems seem to be with the players. My suggestion is to meet with them first and find out what the problems are, you may be able to offer solutions without involving the coach. Al, you are the captain of this team and with that title comes a huge responsibility, take charge and be the leader you seem to be...Good Luck Coach Mac

Coach Mac,

It's my pleasure reading your comment and suggestion. Thank you so much for your wonderful words and it's good to know that you've been here in my country and being in the PBA games also with Alvin Patrimonio. Hope that you'll find time to be back here in the Philippines and maybe I can meet you in person.

I'm doing my part talking with my team mates and letting them know how we will do things in the team and as a team for us to achieve our goal. And I'm getting good response from some of them but not all since our team are mostly rookies. I know I can't do this in one time but I'm trying to teach them one step at a time. My problem is that our coach is not that good listener and sometimes he can't accept his mistake that's why I'm having hard time to talk to him and teach my team mates because as they can see they're not getting good example from our coach. Sometimes if I take charge of the team I feel that my coach feels annoyed maybe because he feels that I have taken his part but I never did. All I want is to help.

Can you give me some advise how I am going to deal with this things because I don't want to make our team miserable. Also I don't want to lose our crown as Champions last season. Our goal for now is to win the Championship and make it three in a row..GRAND SLAM!!

Thank you,
Al

Al: ok, three peat, three in a row...your coach must be doing something right..so thats where you start. You know he has the knowledge, and has the game smarts..so what is his relatioinshp with his team. Is he abusive, is he dictatorial, does he not listen to suggestins..please tell me more details about your coach...Al, he has helped you win two championships..he mus know his stuff, so what is the problem between him and some of the players.ingat..coach Mac..

Al, Coach Mac has some great advice here..... why don't you sit down with the coach and talk about the team.... ask him IF YOU can HELP in any way??

Give us some particular instances that we can give you some concrete advice.

Here is something that the players on your team might benefit from - they NEED to start thinking about the TEAM and NOT themselves.

"Recognize and reward players who put the team first, not just the gifted ones."

Don Meyer

Coach Mac,

Actually it was our former coach who mold us from the begging we we're formed. He handled us for two years and he was a great coach because he's not only developing us a player but also as a good student and a person. He's always there to give advise even in our personal problems. But unfortunately the school didn't hire him anymore on our 3rd year. Our team is actually on its fifth year now. It was just lucky to our new coach who handled us after him because at that time we're all at the peak that's why we won two consecutive championships in his leadership. Now that almost of my former team mates graduated last year, I'm one from the four veterans left in the team. Since the team are almost rookies our coach (new coach) as I can see he cannot handle well the team. He's not talking to us that often compare to our former coach. Even he's not monitoring the performance of the rookies regarding with their studies or even giving advise to the new ones if they have problems. He just let them do things the way they gonna do it that's why I'm the one who act on it as their team capt.

Our coach is not abusive or even dictatorial but as I can see he lacks psychological knowledge on how to take care of the team. He's not fair to everyone ex. all of the players are doing great in practice but during the game he only uses just only 6-7 man rotation even those players are getting exhausted and making mistakes inside the court. I don't know if he has favoritism but obviously he has (in my opinion) that's why some of the players losing their composure and most of them are now getting lazy even going to practice because they thinks that "why go into practice if your practice doesn't put on it"- this is from my team mate he's from Guam. And even one time he ask one of my team mate for a fight just because of a question, that was (my team mate is ask him if what is his philosophy and system for the team) because until now it's not that clear for us. He's just yelling most of the times if the rookies committed mistakes he doesn't explain to them what to do so that next time they would not do it again For me he's the kind of coach that always wants to win games but he didn't try winning his players heart. It seems that he's just there to coach us but he's not their to make us good persons and be great players. Hope you get what I mean.

My comment to the quote: Our coach only recognize only to those who are gifted ones (he wants players that are scorers even they are not playing good defense, he don't yell at them even they are committing errors but he's very angry to those players that are not good but doing things right when they commit mistakes even just a little. He didn't recognize those who work hard for the team.

Those rookies cannot absorb things our coach wanted to do that's why conflict and misunderstanding rises.

Al: What you are telling me fits way too many coaches in this world, however, what you told me can also be said to your coach if you can do that in a very diplomatic way. You need to schedule a meeting with him but away from the gym and just as you wrote, you say those things to him. If he's any kind of a coach, he will listen and hopefully see and realize that there are problems. If he's the other type of coach, then he will listen half heartedly and things will remain the same and if hes the latter, well my best advice to you is to simply suck it up and play your game. You only have this one year to go then you enter the rough tough world of work and there you will meet many people like your coach. I'm sorry that this is happening to you as you sound like a decent young man one that cares. However, its only a game Al and getting an ulcer over it at this stage of your career is just not worth it. Relish in your past championships with your former coach enjoy those memories. By the way, why was your previous coach not hired back? it seems strange that following two consecutive championships he would be released. Coach Mac

Hahaha you're funny coach Mac. Aight i'll suck it, lol!
By the way I don't know what's the real reason why he was not hired back but I'm hearing feedbacks that one of the priest in our school doesn't like him because he used to speak bad words during games and practices. And in other hand I heard that he has mis-understanding with some school officials.

To coach Mac, coach Sar, coach Springer thank you for all the advices and tips you gave. You guys are great and I will be learning from this.

God Bless to all and "INGAT KAYO PALAGI!" (take care always)

Al,

Good luck, hang in there, there are lessons to be learned from every experience, good or bad. Do your best to be a leader, enjoy your last year, have some fun. WE had a saying, PLAY HARD, PLAY SMART and HAVE FUN.

Try to be a teacher to the younger guys - talk to the coach like Coach Mac suggested and see where that goes.

God Bless You too! Thanks for the kind words.

I love the philipinos, some of the most accomodating people on earth. I have many friends in Hong Kong frm the phillipines they are simply wonderful people. When I went there, I had a great time and have many beautiful memories. I fully understand the reasons for your former coach getting fired, I coached in an all catholic girls college in Ohio U.S.A.and saw first hand how the politics of catholisism work. Good luck to you young man and perhaps if I visit your country again we can get together and have a meal. I too speak a little tagalog...iingat Coach Mac

Bottom line - there is vry little loyalty in the business world and schools are no exception ... so be loyal to yourself and the program... try to get all the players to stick together - think of it as one BIG FAMILY.