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PostPosted: 15 Jan 2010, 10:07 

Posts: 1
What do you do about a coach that says things to a player that he shouldn't and threatening them with if you don't do what I say you wont play. On top of that he don't want them to blow a team out and want them to foul people out at the last minute when it\'s tied up allowing the other team to get more points an then scream in their faces like it's their fault when he called the play.

PostPosted: 15 Jan 2010, 11:26 
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Posts: 3139
Tough call, I surmise that one of your kids is on this team...

IF you are truly concerned you might talk to him AFTER a game sometime AWAY from the court, other players and parents. You might talk to him about your concerns.
As for NOT blowing a team out, as far as I am concerned, thats a good thing... there is no need to humilate young kids over a GAME.

I'm not sure what you mean by this.....
"want them to foul people out at the last minute when it\'s tied up allowing the other team to get more points an then scream in their faces like it's their fault when he called the play"
Maybe he feels like that is his best chance of winning the game? Fouling someone that might miss the shot and they get the ball back? As for yelling after they use HIS strategy.... I don't agree with that.
"What do you do about a coach that says things to a player that he shouldn't" -- IS he swearing at them? That is unacceptable.

PostPosted: 15 Jan 2010, 11:51 
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Posts: 191
Location: New Britain, CT.
I'm assuming these are kids elementary/middle school level. If they are high school level there would not be much you can do, it seems that screaming is tolerated at lot more at this level.

So, given that these are young kids it is very obvious that this is unacceptable behavior for a coach.

I would first ask fellow parents what they think of the coach. Get a feel on what other parents think of his antics. I would then approach the league coordinator or recreation administrator. Communicate your concern and let this official contact the other parents to get more information. Hopefully he will talk to the coach.

I wouldn't approach the coach yourself. Most leagues have a governing board or an administrator to enforce rules and monitor coach/player behavior.

PostPosted: 16 Jan 2010, 11:58 

Posts: 4
In our basketball program we encourage parents to meet with the head coach if they have concerns about anything going on with the team their child is playing on. However, our parents are also instructed to use the 3R's when doing so. Right Time, Right Place and Right Spirit. If you are concerned about inappropriate things being said by the coach to the players then set up a meeting with the coach. Don't do it right after a game or practice. Make sure you are calm and in the right spirit when you do meet with the coach. If the coach is not receptive or does not change the inappropriate behavior then you set up a meeting with the coach's administrator or A.D. Again, in doing so use the 3R approach. Hopefully after this meeting the coach will make the necessary "communication" adjustments.

PostPosted: 16 Jan 2010, 21:10 
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Posts: 315
Mom: before I answer your query, there is some information I need to ask you

1. Is your son or daughter a starter on this team or do they come in off the bench.?
2. What position does your child play?
3. How much playing time does your child get during the game?
4. what level is your child playing at ie. elementary, middle, High school?
5. what type of things does the coach say to your child that you consider innapropriate?
6. You say the coach yells at the players or gets angry at the players, does he/she do this in the confines of the locker room or out on the floor during the game?

It has long been my contention, that if a child was half as good as his parents thaught he was or twice as good as the child himself thaught he was, you would have a pretty good player Coach Mac

PostPosted: 17 Jan 2010, 12:12 

Posts: 176
I agree -- more details needed. What age are we talking about? Is this your first hand experience or what the kid is saying happened?

PostPosted: 20 Jan 2010, 16:51 

Posts: 33
Location: Courtenay, BC, Canada
From a coaches point of view, it is my duty to not yell, talk down to any player regardless. If I did what example am I setting for this individual and his/her teammates?
If it is flagrant or combative player then I ask: was he/she always like this? What has happened to start this behaviour? Find the root of the issue but not publicly admonish that player.

On that note I am for proper discipline, team discipline. If players are not working hard enough, the team does lines, if players are talking while I talk, they do pushups etc.

Parents concerns need to be discussed openly and quickly so things do not fester. Coaches that cross the line need to be removed if justified. Substantiated complaints, etc. But I have also heard of coaches being released because a parent group were not happy with his coaching strategies. (play types, defence).

Regardless, open communication is extremely important for all parties, coaches-parents-players. It starts at pre-season and continues as season progresses.

PostPosted: 20 Jan 2010, 17:30 
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Posts: 3139

I wish you would get back to us on this subject.... maybe we could give you a more better answer. We need the specifics.

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