Is there a good/standard rule book that I can get for my girls team, grades 6-8? I have a beginning team and there will be lots of whistles. I would like the girls (and me) to know the rules and why that strange man in the striped shirt keeps blowing his whistle at us :)

thanks for your help

Your state association should have a rule book. You can google that. But it will probably be very long. A simplified version of the basic basketball rules can be found here.
http://www.breakthroughbasketball.com/basics/basics.html

is the a rule for the defence player gaurding in inbounbing player.

The defender can't go over the out of bounds line and can't touch the ball. Beyond that, try to find the rule book for your state association for all the details. The coach might be able to help you with that too.

There are state association rulebooks available on-line. The rules that are played at the High School Level tend to be the same rules played at the middle school level.

I coach middle school basketball in Illinois. The rule book we use is the same IHSA rulebook that is enforced at the high school level.

The rule regarding defending an inbounds passer tend to be standard across basketball. You can treat it like there is a plane of glass extending up from the out of bounds line. You are not supposed to reach over it or touch the ball as long as it is in the hands of the passer.

First time you do reach across the line or touch the ball in the possession of the inbounds player the ref will stop play and call a delay of game warning. Every subsequent time it happens after that is a technical foul. Result will be one or two free throws for the opposing team and ball back for inbounds where the original violation occurred.