Maybe some veteran coaches can offer some wisdom. I'm a second year coach of 9-10 year old boys and I stressed to them early on, it's not about the ws and ls but getting better. Problem is, the more we practice, the worse we get. They stick to the game plan during practice but when the game starts, each man does exactly what I teach them not to do. After telling him 100 times not to, my pg will try to dribble between two defenders instead of looking for an open man. I have a couple of kids who just stand around on offense and lose their man on defense. How do I delicately tell them they're not listening or doing what their told without discouraging them? Would benching them for awhile be appropriate at this age? One kid almost cried at practice because his team lost a 5 on 5 drill.

Why don't you try scrimmaging WITHOUT the DRIBBLE? This will force them to move without the ball, it will get them to look for the open man because they cant dribble the ball.
Be patient, this is a tough age.... think of baby steps here. I'm not sure I would bench them IF they are TRYING. That I would use for kids that are out of control behavior wise etc.
Someone once said... try to do it all in a positive way... encourage them, praise them by NAME... everybody wants to hear good things attached to their name. Great pass Johnny, Way to get open Johnny etc. All of a sudden they will work hard to get your praise and hear their name.
While you want them to be competitive, you sure don't want to see a kid get so upset that he will cry over a drill. I had seniors cry after their last game of the year several times... and that WAS tough for me.... it took awhile before I could talk to reporters.. they understood.

Hang in there and God Bless you for working with this age group.

Can't think of a single coach I've talked with who doesn't experience this from 9/10 yr olds to pros. Comes w/ the territory, especially with younger kids. The noise level in some of the gyms is off the hook. Coaches are yelling, parents are yelling, the game itself is a fast paced affair, it's asking a lot of 9 & 10 yr olds to execute. My advice here is to keep a calm demeanor during the games. The more hyped up you are, the more hyped up the kids get in an already hyped up environment.

What you emphasize and reward is what the kids will usually focus on. Reward (get excited) about passes, assists, and kids who get open if that's what you're looking for. Try the sheriff drill (use search function on this site - search for "sheriff") for help with defense in practice.

I rarely see teams in my 5th/6th grade league that pass frequently, so I emphasize it as much as possible.

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Let me add one last thing. I like what Sar had to say about using the player's name in a positive manner. Catch them doing something right, especially in a game situtation. If your pg is usually a ball hog, catch him passing and make a huge deal out of it during a time out. Same goes for the kid who loses his man on defense or the one who usually stands there on offense. When they stay with their man or get open, go nuts. Forget what I said about the "calm demeanor" when it comes to this positive stuff, get excited!!

Rook,

Trust me. I feel your pain. I've got the same age group. It sucks.

My take is that most of the kids just don't have the mental capabilities to play at this age. No matter how much you tell them, it just doesn't compute. It is the most frustrating experience there is. I don't know the answer, but I think you need to handle each kid differently. Some kids respond to positive reinforcment, but some need a kick in the butt. Some just won't do it. Just don't make anyone cry. I have a friend who made one of his players cry at half time. Not good.

Good luck.

rookie:

A coach said this earlier and i merely want to stress and add credence to his suggestion. I've often said that it is not so much what you coach but what you emphasize that really counts. Your coaching philosophy will tell you what you want to emphasize, but remember that your players will react to what you are emphasizing. In their eagerness to please, they will try to do what they know is important to you. On on the opposite end of the spectrum from positive verbal reinforcement is punishment. I don't even like the word "punishment" yet some coaches punish more than they praise.

I strongly suggest that you never discipline to punish rather discipline to teach. Praise your players whenever possible, especially for an outstanding effort. Take the time to talk with your players individually to motivate them and to work out problems. Partial suspensions or reducing playing time as punishment can send the wrong message to a player. remember, we were all young mistake laden coaches at one time..Coach Mac

Thanks everyone!!! Great advice!!!