Ask them... would you rather win and sit on the bench? or lose and play? As long as their honest i think we know what their answer will be. Kids want to play, have fun, and improve. And from my experience, kids are very willing to sacrifice wins for improvement. But not as many parents are willing to do that.

http://www.thecenterforkidsfirst.org/pdf/Statistics.pdf
Why they participate
1990 Athletic Footwear Association Survey of over 20,000 kids nation-wide asked, “Why they
participate in sports.”
1. To have fun
2. To improve their skills
3. To stay in shape
4. To do something they are good at
5. The excitement of the competition
6. To get exercise
7. To play as part of a team
8. The challenge of the competition
9. To learn new skills
10. To win
· Over 65% said they participate in sports to be with friends.
· 15% were reluctant to participate
· Only 20% want to improve their skills
· Winning was LAST.

Great information Jeff....

FUN is always #1 - trust me, IF they are not having FUN, they won't be back - Remember, the game is for the KIDS - NOT the PARENTS.

The game gets more serious when they get to the high school level... that's soon enough... although 7/8th graders get pretty serious too.... but they want to PLAY ... not sit. II know there are some middle schools around my area where there are 5 kids that play the 1st qtr and 5 different ones that play the 2nd qtr... anybody can play in the second half.... carrying `12 players usually gets everyone in the game. While they want to WIN... they are a lot happier when they get in the game and get a chance to play.

You never know when you will find a diamond in the rough..... I saw a lot of freshman improve and become starters and some all conference players which came from the frosh B team, some did NOT make their 8th grade team.

Good thread. I have seen surveys that show that kids put winning behind having fun, learning new skills and playing with friends. As they get older, it starts to become more important but does no supplant those other aspects. Of course for parents/adults, winning is a higher priority, especially if you are coaching a team that it is part of a competitive/select league or club.

As a coach I have struggled with the whole W and competitiveness issue, especially as it concerns the parents. My team started out as 3rd graders and a bunch of families who wanted to play more than just winter basketball and were seeking something more competitive than rec (mine included). We played in an AAU league and a couple tournaments our first year, basically got whomped either by older teams or teams associated with clubs that produced the likes of Kevin Durant, Nolan Smith, Michael Beasley, et al. But we started getting better as the year went on and some of Ls dropped into the single digits. The kids had fun in the practices and sometimes in the games though I also know they found the games stressful with full on presses and very rowdy crowds. However, at the end of the season I had to wrestle with a parent coup led by an overzealous dad and the departure of a couple of my better players to stronger teams that we lost to.

Nest year we found a better league option. We played up a year but not against AAU type teams. Still faced presses and the occasional belligerent crowd. We scratched out a few wins, were competitive in all games, kids got better and so did I. But once again at the end of the year, I lost a couple families to better teams. I was told that this was in part due to my playing time philosophy (which was not equal but did guarantee meaningful time to all and we had 11 kids) and that I would not cut some of the weaker players. But I still think it was based on the W issue. If we had gone 7-3 instead of 3-7 the departures would not have happened.

So I reset this past year and affiliated my team with a club. The club had another team in our age group coached by a friend that is an excellent team. So now some of my stronger players had an option if they "wanted and were ready to move up" and one of them did. One of his weaker players came to my team and it was a good fit for both. I kept my roster size small to minimize playing time issues. With more experience (coach and players both), we were more successful in terms of W-Ls and are currently undefeated in a summer league. There has only been one departure and no parent revolts. I have certainly gotten better as a teacher and coach (still loads more to learn!) and I think that is at least partly reflected by the results on the court. I wish I knew then what I know now.

I think the Ws are the parents' way of measuring the coach, team, and their son's performance and progress. And in a way it is that and I can't blame them too much for focusing on it. The more sophisticated ones understand that the game result is only a piece of it and that there are other intangibles that go into making the experience for their sons productive and meaningful. I have a few parents "who get it" and others who are coming along.

In all it continues to be a rewarding, though at time frustrating (less so now) experience. I wish I had been smarter about some things in the beginning but then if I didn't go through those bumpy first two years I might not have learned those hard lessons that are bearing fruit now.

Coach O - it sounds like you're finding that comfort zone with not only you but your parents. I've been fortunate enough to have parents who enjoy basketball for basketball and not focus on wins and losses - and therefore jump to another team. Our town is very small but my sons class has a lot of boys who participate.

The last three years we've played in a rec league where the talent in my son's class has been divided and we're forced to use equal playing time, which is nice since we (me and parents) get to see their kids improve throughout the season. The last two years in the rec league, I've struggled with my competitive spirit (and our boys' as well) and I focused on equal playing time and then try to win within that priority. For the most part, Some of my more talented kids play more in the 2nd half than the 1st ... but always equal PT.

This last year was my first year to take a team to a tournament and like you - we got smoked by some club teams and the fact we played up an age group. I pretty much took my same 3rd grade rec team with 2 additions - two 4th graders. It was stressful for me and my team but in the end I think it opened their eyes to see what kind of tams are out there and how good they are. it definately wasn't the ending to the season I was hoping for but I have to hope they improved.

Brent -

Its sad that so many paren't / fans judge the coach on his W/L record. The game is pretty simple, IF you have some kids that can score, you will win a lot of games.... but at this age the LAST thing that parents should be worrying about is WINNING.

This age group is all about developing players and getting them ready to play at the next level - who cares IF you win every game and your kids cant play at the next level and especially the high school level.

Youth coaches should have two goals, teaching their kids the fundamentals of the game andthe #1 goal should be FUN!
IF they are not having fun and developing a love for the game, they just might drop out before they get to the high school level.

By the way, WINNING is a by product of a fundamentally sound team. Have fun with your players...It sounds like you and Coach O are on the right track. Good luck

Brent, sounds like you are hitting your stride also. Having grown up in a small town I can see that there would be benefits from coaching in that type of environment. I am now in a big urban/suburban area. On the plus side, there are a lot of options for play at all levels. The flip side is that it creates a very competitive environment (yes, there is some goof to that too) but combined with a lot of type A parents who in many cases have an unrealistic view of their child's ability and are used to demanding the best puts a lot of pressure on us coaches knowing that after any season they might bolt for what they perceive to be greener pastures. In some cases I am more than happy to see themago, in others I don't like losing their kids and wonder if they are really doing them a service. I am lucky at the moment where I think the parents are happy and have a good perspective.